Except, it feels like as soon as we make it past one obstacle, there’s an even bigger one waiting for us. I didn’t think I was made for relationships, but I want it all with him.

It’s the other stuff, the way he makes my pulse race and my heart swell, that’s throwing me for a loop. I’m not one to stress about being into a man for the first time. If it was just my newly discovered bisexuality, that’d be one thing. Whether it’s on our calls or when he flies to Atlanta, we talk about everything, lying awake together half the night. All I know is, months later, my days aren’t complete until we tell each other good night. I still can’t say how it happened, how a random decision to strike up a conversation with Jeremy turned into…whatever this is. When I head back to California, I expect our chats to end, but I couldn’t be more wrong. Darren is a full-steam-ahead kind of guy, and one talk leads to hanging out, swapping phone numbers, and pranking West and Anson while they’re on their honeymoon. Strangely, at West’s wedding, I find myself confiding in Darren, the straight, confirmed bachelor and star quarterback of the Atlanta Lightning.

My divorce, which was amicable, followed. Seeing my best friend West, happy with his fiancé opened my eyes to things I’ve been missing in my own marriage. He's the endgame in the biggest challenge of my life, the one I'm banking my future happiness on. The odds are stacked against us, but if there's one thing I know, it's how to win. I have contract obligations to fulfill, and I'm closeted. Now we're all in with each other, but he still has time left in his Senate term. But once isn't enough, and we keep sneaking around together-brief encounters, in California, Georgia, or DC, filled with passionate touches and whispered truths. When he asks for one night together so he can show me what it's like to be with a man, I can't say no. West's the only person who knows all the parts of me, just like I know his. Though my identity doesn't stay a secret from him for long.īetween texts and late-night phone calls, we get to know each other. At least he doesn't know who I am-the best tight end in the NFL, playing for the Atlanta Lightning. No one has ever guessed my secret until the gorgeous man at a bar in DC. Pretending isn't easy, but it means I can keep playing football. I've always known I'm gay, but never acted on it. So, when I'm in DC and see a beautiful guy at the hotel bar, I don't hesitate to proposition him.right before he runs out on me, leaving his sunglasses behind like my very own Cinderfella.

From college, to law school, to the United States Senate representing California, I've done it all as an out gay man. When I left home, I swore I'd never hide anything about myself again.

The End Zone by Riley Hart